Siberian Wildflowers
by Anne Finch
Summary: Original Char/Alt Time/story line. Natasha Belova is getting ready to start her 6th year when her death-eater parents decide to move from Siberia to England, thus forcing her to attend Hogwarts. Will she survive? Be warned! Contains some mature content!
1. ONE

Summery: (OC, AT: Alt Timeline) Natasha Belova is getting ready to start her 6th year when her death-eater parents decide to move from Siberia to England, thus forcing her to attend Hogwarts. (OC, DM, HG & Others) Contains some mature content.

Disclaimer #1: I do not own the original characters or concepts of Harry Potter. These can only be claimed by the talented and infamous, J.K. Rowling!

Disclaimer #2: Contains mature content including sexually explicit scenes as well as language. Please do not read if you are under the legal age or if you are offended by sexual scenes.

**ONE**

The doors to the main hall loomed before me as I stopped with the group of first years, waiting to be ushered in. The train ride had been a terrible experience. I had felt claustrophobic the entire time. I hated being stuck in one place for so long, especially with no way to escape.

The tall, bearded man herded us through the doors and into a side room where another professor began to explain what would be happening. The first years were going to be sorted into one of four houses. They would be called up one-by-one, alphabetically, and they would receive their fate for the next seven years.

It all seemed rather dramatic to me. I was used to my old Academy. We were a small school and we weren't divided in any way. Sometimes, during school-wide activities they would divide us up as the boys team and the girls team, but that was it. We had just under a hundred students in total for all seven years. Of course, that was in Siberia and not in England.

The only reason I was here was because my father had accepted a new position within his company that forced us to move to this awful place. Okay, so England may not be awful, but I had spent five years at my Academy in Siberia, and I loved it there.

"Miss Belova?"

"Yes?" The voice had snapped me out of my reminiscing.

"It's your turn." I sighed, squared my shoulders, and confidently strode through the door.

"And now, students, please welcome our newest 6th Year student, Miss Natasha Belova. She is joining us all the way from the Trans-Siberian Wizarding Academy" said a tall, bearded man. He was grey haired, his eyes and his robes a light, twinkling blue.

Whispers erupted throughout the hall, everyone was staring at me. I hated being the center of attention. I could feel my cheeks warming.

"Miss Belova, please have a seat and we will get you sorted," he said quietly to me.

"Hmm… You're not from around here, now are you?" The hat whispered, "Let us see now, where would you fit in? Belova rings a bell, not a very good bell either." It said in an almost disapproving voice.

I groaned inwardly and silently cursed in Russian. Of course Belova rang a bell. My father may have transferred here with his job, but he also had other business here. He had come to conspire with the other Death-eaters I am sure.

"Slytherin!" The table to my immediate right broke out in applause, I assumed that they were the Slytherins.

Happy to be out of the spotlight, I slinked off the stool and made my way to an empty seat near the head of the table.

The old man—who I would come to know as Dumbledore—began a speech, which I found to be quite hard to pay attention to. The other students around me, those that I assumed to be first years, seemed to hang on his every word.

I was happy to see that a feast of roast and vegetables appeared on the table in front of us all. At least they seemed to eat similar food here to what I was used to eating. The first years stared in awe at the arrangement , I simply filled my plate and began eating. This was something that I was used to, even in my own home.

I was about done with my meal when a figure came up beside me. "Hi, I'm Draco Malfoy. I'm one of the Slytherin Prefects. When you are finished I will show you to the common room." said a blonde haired boy. I suppose boy was the wrong word to use here. He was far from being a boy, but I believe that he still had much to learn before he would be considered a man. He had stormy grey eyes that I found magnetic.

"I'm finished," I replied, pushing my plate away and standing. "I'm Natasha by the way."

"I know," he smirked.

I didn't tell him that I knew him as well, or rather I know _of_ him. I knew his father. He had visited often in Siberia. I think, perhaps, that is one of the reasons my father pushed so hard to move to England. In fact, our new house, I believe, is just down the street from the Malfoy Manor.

"Oh," he said, almost as if he had forgotten, "here is your schedule." His hand lingered as he passed it to me.

"Thanks." I was concerned for a moment. I found him to be strangely attractive, but if he was anything like his father, which was highly likely, then he would be a pompous ass. I decided right then and there that I needed one less pompous ass in my life. I would, under no circumstances, be associating with Draco Malfoy.

"Well, here we are. The password is Mandrake. Girls' dorms are to the left."

"Thank you for your help," I said as I made my way towards the girls' stiars.

"Not a problem," he paused, "Hey, do you want to go for a walk? I can show you the sights."

I could see his motive spinning around in his head. I was a pretty girl. I have long, dark wavy/softly curly hair and deep blue eyes. I could easily read his reputation from his body language and from his cocky smirk. He was a ladies man. "No, thank you."

He stared after me as I made my way up the stairs. He may be attractive, and he may have magnetic, stormy eyes that I couldn't get out of by head, but I was not in the mood for drama. And that was exactly what I imagined Draco Malfoy was—drama.


	2. TWO

**TWO**

The dining hall had very few people in it when I arrived. It was early, even for me, but I had had trouble sleeping. I hated Hogwarts already and it was only my first official day.

I looked down at the schedule that I had lain on the table and saw that I had Potions first period. I hated Potions; however I was excellent at it.

As I had been eating, the dining hall had filled up. I finished and decided to make my way to class early. When I had asked someone how to get to Potions, they told me that it was in the dungeons, like the common room, and pointed towards a hallway that I should follow.

I found the hallway again, easily, and followed it to an open doorway. It looked like a classroom, so I took a gamble.

"Miss Belova, I am Professor Snape. You are early."

"Didn't have any where else to go," I replied, shrugging.

"Grab a seat, Miss Belova. I saw in your transcripts that you excelled in Potions."

"So they told me. It's not really my favorite subject."

"We'll see what we can do about that."

Within ten minutes the classroom had filled up. There was a dark, bushy haired girl that was seated next to me. She looked a little weary when she sat down, but as class wore on, I hadn't sprouted fangs and tried to rip her jugular out, so she started to relax.

Our assignment was to create a potion that would change our clothing. It was a little over the top, and useless, but I added the ingredients together easily and it turned the obligatory emerald green.

"Well, well, Mr. Malfoy, it looks like Miss Belova may give you a run for your money." Snape chimed as he examined my potion and placed a sample of it into a small vile. "Fifty points to Slytherin."

Once we had all turned in our potions we were dismissed. Unfortunately, that was the most exciting class of the day.

I ended up in the library with three essays to work on. I noticed at the table across from me the bushy haired girl from Potions.

"Hi," I said walking over to her, "I'm Natasha. We have Potions together."

"I'm Hermione." She said smiling.

"So, doo they always give homework like this?"

"Yeah, Snape is usually the worst."

"Of course he is, my least favorite subject and it's the one that requires the most work."

"Your least favorite? But you are really good! You are better than I am, even better than Malfoy!"

I shrugged, "What's with this Malfoy kid anyways?"

Hermione made a face, "He thinks he is the Gods' gift to the world. He is the self proclaimed 'Slytherin Prince.' He's a horrible awful git who hates anyone who is not a Pure-blooded Slytherin."

"So, pompous ass pretty much sums him up like I originally thought," I stated matter-of-factly.

Hermione giggled.

By my second month at Hogwarts, I had kind of settled into the way of things. Hermione and I had become study buddies, if not friends. I hadn't really been talking to too many other people, especially not the Slytherins. I understood why I was sorted into the house, but their elitist attitudes made me sick.

Saturdays had become a favorite day of mine because I could spend it doing what ever I wanted to do. Today I was spending it reading by the lake.

Autumn was my favorite time of year, and now that it was mid-October, Fall was in full swing. There was a slight breeze and the leaves were turning colors. We didn't really get Fall in Siberia. I mean, it gets warm in some areas, but for the most part it is cold.

I had just gotten to a good part of my mystery novel when a shadow fell across it. I looked over to see Malfoy sitting down beside me on the lawn.

"The way the sun catches your hair, you realize that it has a little red in it. Did you know that?"

"Are you attempting to flirt?" I questioned.

"I…"

"You are doing a terrible job." I said, sending him a smirk of my own.

I still found him infuriatingly attractive—even if he was a jerk. I had tried denying it, but it was hard.

"How would you like to go to the Halloween Ball with me?"

"Is that supposed to be like some big honor, going with you?"

"Yes." He said, his voice seeping with cockiness.

"I'll think about it, but don't hold your breath." Inside I was screaming, yes, I'll go with you! Just promise me that I can stare into your eyes all night. I caught myself actually staring and quickly looked back down at my book.

"You are one tough girl to crack, Belova." His smirk was a little closer to a smile this time, "But, mark my words, I don't give up easily." With that he stood up and walked back towards the castle. I couldn't help but watch as he walked away. He had a great butt.

That week several guys had asked me to the dance. I had not accepted any of their offers. I had decided to go stag, or rather I would be going with my friend, Hermione. She had not gotten a date and I felt bad for her. She was a beautiful girl and I didn't understand why the guys didn't appreciate it.

That Saturday she and I traveled to Hogsmeade to find dresses. It was getting marginally colder outside and we each wore a scarf around our necks.

We had been getting a lot of stares lately because of our friendship. I thought that I would have a hard time at Hogwarts because my father was a death-eater. It seemed though, that only a handful of Slytherins knew this information. I wouldn't complain as long as they left me alone.

The dress shop was busy. A dozen girls filled the small shop, scanning the racks for something acceptable. Almost immediately after entering, Hermione found a gorgeous indigo colored gown.

"Oh, 'Mione, that's beautiful!" I exclaimed as she stared at herself in the three-way mirror.

"It would be if a filthy Mudblood wasn't wearing it," sneered a voice that belonged to Pansy Parkinson.

My blood turned cold, "What did you just say, Parkinson?"

"You heard me, Belova," she spat, "You're a disgrace to Slytherins everywhere—hanging out with Mudbloods, and the Chosen One's best friend at that. What would your parents say?"

Before I knew what I was doing, I had my wand drawn and pointed at Parkinson, "I suggest that you leave, now."

Parkinson seemed to debate whether or not she thought I was serious. In the end she must have realized that I was indeed serious and she made her way out of the shop in a huff.

After a few moments of collecting myself, I turned back to Hermione and smiled, "Now, to find myself a dress."

I finally ended up with a long, black gown. It had a sweet-heart neckline with off the shoulder cap sleeves. It was formfitting, but flared from the knee down, giving it a sort of mermaid feel. It fit my slim 5'7" frame perfectly.

Following our dress purchases, we stopped for coffee before heading back to Hogwarts.

"Who are your parents?" Hermione asked.

"What?" I questioned, dreading having to answer, I'm not my parents and I hate being judged based on them.

"Your parents, Parkinson mentioned them. Who are they, why wouldn't they approve?"

"It's not important. They are who they are and I am who I am. We are very different and I don't care about their approval."

With that Hermione dropped it. I was very grateful. I knew that she was good friends with Potter and I didn't that that she would take well to the revelation.


	3. THREE

**THREE**

It had been announced that the dance would be a Masquerade. I hadn't had time to get a mask, but there were supposed to be masks available for us to use. I figured I would just grab one on my way into the dance.

As I descended the stairs the common room I felt several pairs of eyes on me. By far, I wasn't the prettiest girl in school, but in that moment I felt like I was near the top of the list.

Laid out on a table near the door were several masks to choose from. As I made my way to the table the room seemed to clear out. There were masks of all colors spread out, but I didn't see one that would really go with my dress.

"I think this one would do you justice," said a familiar voice. I looked and saw Malfoy.

He was standing next to me holding a black and silver mask. It was delicate and intricate with lots of little details. I couldn't help but smile at him, a real smile, and he seemed to return it.

"Can I help you tie it on?" There was something about him. When he was alone he was like a different person.

"Yes," I whispered and he reached around my head to tie it—bringing our bodies close.

"Just as I thought," he whispered back. There was lust in his eyes and slowly the space between us was closing. We were mere inches apart.

"Natasha, can I kiss you?" he asked breathily.

I pulled in air to answer him when a voice made us jump apart.

"Drackie, I'm ready." Parkinson sing-songed, coming down the steps in one of the sluttiest dresses I had ever seen. She regarded me with disgust and a mix of fear.

I watched as Malfoy's face changed, a hardened, arrogant mask slid over his features. He picked up a random mask off the table and met Parkinson near the door.

"Here, put this on," he said thrusting it towards her as he slid his own mask into place.

It took me several moments to collect myself. I had nearly kissed Draco Malfoy. I felt like a giddy little girl with a school girl crush. He would certainly not have been my first kiss, but the butterflies that danced in my stomach tried to tell me otherwise.

When I finally made it to the dance and met up with Hermione that party was in full swing. We made our way to the dance floor and danced the night away.

We stepped away to grab some drinks when suddenly Harry Potter was standing before me.

"Excuse me, Potter," I said trying to step around him. He side stepped and continued to block me. Some how Hermione had been separated from me; soon there were three or four guys surrounding me.

"I think you should stay away from Hermione." He said with venom in his voice. "I wont have my best friend associating with death-eaters."

"The last time I checked, Potter, Hermione can make her own decisions and she can speak with whomever she wishes. You don't own her."

"Does she even know?" He sneered. "Hermione, did you know that Belova here is a death-eater in training? She's only using you to get inside information."

"That's not true," I said dangerously.

"Oh, your father isn't Kristof Belova?"

"Yes, my father is but—"

"Keep away." Potter spat as he turned on his heel and steered Hermione out of the hall with Weasley's help.

I stood where I was, partially shocked and partially furious. I was glad for the mask because I was sure that my face was flushing beneath it. Angry tears threatened to spring to my eyes, but I fought to gain control of my emotions. I felt my face harden as I watched my friend walk out and not even glance backwards.

Several people were staring, but it was dark, stormy eyes that locked with mine. They were smoldering. The entire hall was silent, they had all heard the exchange.

I let a mask of cool, calmness take over me. Slowly I began to walk towards the exit. This was one of the reasons I had not wanted to attend Hogwarts.

I didn't want to go to the common room, nor did I want to see anyone. I made my way to the Owlry. I needed to be alone and that was the only place I could think of.

The soft chatter of the birds was relaxing and I huddled myself into a corner. I kicked off my shoes and brought my knees up to my chest. Frustrated, I pulled off the mask and tossed it on t he bench beside me. I completely lost track of time while I sat there.

When I finally felt like I had calmed down enough, I slipped my shoes on and started heading for the common room. I almost forgot my mask on the bench. Going back for it I noticed initials on the back of the mask—DM. Below the initials were the words _nunquam redono_—never give up in latin.

"No, it can't be. He couldn't have" I whispered to myself.

"He made it himself, by hand," said a voice stepping into the room. I recognized him, Zambini, Blaise Zambini. "Draco worked on it for over a week. He didn't think anyone noticed him staying up late working on it, but I did. I've never seen him work on something so diligently before."

"Wow," was all I could manage. I still refused to give into my feelings towards Malfoy though. Things would never work between us. We were too different and he was his father's son.

"Can I walk you back to the common room?"

I nodded. My mind was focused on other things and I just wanted to go to bed.

Once I got to my dorm I stowed the mask and my gown in the trunk at the foot of my bed.

Eventually I was able to fall asleep, and I welcomed the break from my roving thoughts.


	4. FOUR

**FOUR**

Christmas break was quickly approaching; in fact I was going home the next day. Today was my last final before I was officially on break.

Over the last few months a few things had changed. Hermione had isolated herself from me. We rarely met in the library anymore. It was as if she was avoiding the library because she knew I'd be there.

The last time we had run into each other I had asked her to come to my house during the break. My parents would be leaving after the first week of break and I would be home by myself for the remainder of break.

She had agreed to come and spend the weekend after my parents left with me. I was looking forward to it. I missed my friend. I hoped that we could strengthen our friendship and I would have someone to spend time with again.

The day after the Halloween Ball Potter had mysteriously broken his arm when he slipped on "pumpkin juice" in the dinning hall. It was mysterious because no matter what Madame Pomfrey did, she could not heal his broken arm. It was as if it were cursed to heal at a normal, non-magical human rate. Therefore, Potter's arm was still in a cast. I had a feeling that Draco may have had something to do with that.

Draco had apparently had enough of my rejections and he had moved on the Parkinson. I saw them kissing on the couch the other night.

I had fallen into a sort of depression. I kept to myself and spent most of my days in the library or in some random corner of a hallway, reading. I wanted to be left alone and I had successfully accomplished that.

I passed my final exam with flying colors. It was Potions, so there was no surprise there.

The next morning I found myself on the train heading home. A sleek black sedan met me at the station and drove me home.

The scenery was pretty. Snow filled trees lined our road. The driver turned onto a nearly hidden driveway and my new house loomed in front of me. It was a sprawling brick affair that held more rooms than our family of three could ever need.

My mother met me inside the front door.

"Natasha, I'm so glad you are home!"

"Hello, mother," I sighed.

"What's the matter with you?"

"I'm just tired from the trip. Do you think I can nap before dinner?"

"Of course, Macy will show you to your room."

A tan house elf appeared near my feet. She grabbed my bags and motioned for me to follow her up the stairs—up one flight of stairs and to the right, down three doors and to the left. The door opened into a spacious replication of my room in Siberia. The only difference was that my bathroom was larger and it had a large soaking tub as well as a shower.

"Macy hopes that Miss Natasha enjoys her new room."

"Thanks, Macy."

"Macy also wants Miss Natasha to know that dinner will be at eight o'clock and that there will be guests joining the Belovas."

"Guests?"

"Yes, Miss Natasha, the Malfoys will be guests."

_Great_, I thought to myself_, just what I need, Draco and his stormy eyes in my dining room. Not to mention his awful father._

Dinner in the Belova household was never a small affair. Often we had dinner guests, if we didn't have guests we didn't have a meal together. Already I could hear the house elves scampering around to clean the silver and cook the pig that would be served. That's right, a whole pig, apple in its mouth and all. Who eats that anymore?

I tried to nap, but I had known when I came up here that sleeping wouldn't be an option. I ran some warm water into the tub and added bubbles. Hopefully a nice long soak would help to ease my stress. If not, then I didn't know what to do.

Dinner guests meant formal attire. I opened my closet and stared at the dresses on the right. After shifting through a few I decided to try a black strapless one. It was cut straight across the top and fell a few inches above my knees with a bubble skirt. There was a wide, black sash tied around the waist in a giant bow. I would slip on a pair of black pumps with it. As for my hair, I dried it and styled it so that it hung loosely past my shoulders. The top was slightly straight and the ends were a tangle of large, loose curls.

I was making my way down the stairs as Macy was escorting the Malfoys into the living room for cocktails before dinner.

"Natasha, just as lovely, if not more than you were the last time I saw you." Lucius crooned.

"Thank you," I said giving my head a slight bow. I may not like him, but I was taught from an early age that it did matter what you thought of the other death-eaters, you showed respect and you were polite. Failure to do so would result in the application of the Cruciatus Curse. I had learned the hard way.

I sat myself on the far end of the sofa, hoping that everyone would forget that I was here and they would ignore me. I sighed when I felt someone sit down next to me. Fortunately it was not Lucius who had inhabited the space next to me, it was Draco. Unfortunately, I still hadn't resolved my feelings towards Draco, and my stomach gave a small lurch due to his close proximity. It was then that I noticed our fathers were seated nearer to the fireplace—speaking "business" no doubt. Our mothers had taken up the loveseat and were deep in conversation about who knew what. Draco and I were left to entertain ourselves.

"Hi," he said trying to break the tension.

"Hi," I said back, not knowing what to talk about with him. He seemed to be having the same problem.

"How did you do on the Potions final?"

School was the last thing that I wanted to talk about, but it was the only thing that we had in common. "Aced it."

"I figured you would. I think you may even be better than Snape himself." At that I grinned and looked sideways at him.

I tried to come up with something witty to say, but our eyes had locked and all thoughts had vanished from my mind. I nearly forgot to breathe; luckily the burning in my chest reminded me of my body's demand for oxygen. His eyes were even stormier than I remembered. I could lose myself in them forever, being perfectly content with staring into his eyes for the rest of my life.

"Dinner is served." My mother announced breaking our staring match.

I chuckled awkwardly and made to stand up. Suddenly, Draco was standing in front of me, offering his hand to help me up off the couch. He rested my hand on the crook of his elbow and escorted me to the table. Once at the table he pulled my chair out for me. It was very odd. I had never seen Draco act like such a gentleman before.

Dinner lasted several hours, after which our parents needed another cocktail hour. I wanted no part of sitting around with the "adults" and having serious conversations.

"Would you like to take a walk in the garden?" I asked Draco as we both stood awkwardly at the edge of the living room.

"Yes, I think that is a good idea." He responded.

We both excused ourselves and crossed the foyer to get to the courtyard/garden that was set up to the west of the house.

Silently we made our way down the paved walk and towards the gazebo at the far end of the gazebo. We sat on one of the benches that overlooked the fountain—our view of the house nearly obscured.

"So, what—" Draco began, but I didn't let him finish. I leaned over and did what I had wanted to do since that first night that I met him. I kissed him. I had to. I had to know what it would feel like to kiss him. My body was yearning with curiosity.

His lips were softer than I imagined—that was my first thought. They were soft, and his bottom lip was full and so totally kissable. The only thing that would have made it better was if I could have stared into his mesmerizing eyes while I kissed him.

Suddenly, I came to my senses and realized what I had just done. Startled, I pulled away. His eyes were burning with lust and desire. He tried to speak, but like myself, he was at a loss for words. He smiled a genuine smile. He smiled and I bolted. I jumped up off the bench and ran towards the house. He called after me, but I just kept going.

It was a very Cinderella moment. If I had lost my shoe it would have been perfect.


	5. FIVE

*****Warning!** This chapter contains sexual content. Read at your own risk!***

**FIVE**

I didn't see Draco again at spontaneous family dinners. In fact, we didn't have any other guests over for the rest of the time that my parents were home.

On the Friday following my return home—exactly one week from my after dinner smooch with Draco—my parents left to go where ever it was that they were going. This left me alone and lonely. That afternoon I received an owl from Hermione. She said she was terribly sorry, but something had come up, and she wouldn't be able to travel out to the Manor over break.

My life just got more depressing. I decided that since I had nothing better to do, I mind as well wallow in my own self pity. I stationed myself in my bed and had Macy bring me a pint of ice cream and a small box of chocolates. I knew it would only be a matter of time before I asked her for my comfort food standby—Pumpkin Spice Cookies. I think she knew that too.

My bed had become my day to day life. I had been in it for three days when Macy came scrambling into my room.

"M—m—miss Natasha! Mr. Malfoy is here to see you! Quick, get dressed!"

I groaned and hauled myself out of bed. I threw on jeans and the first tee-shirt I could find in my closet. I pointed my wand at my hair, forcing it to do anything but look like I had been laying on it, unwashed for three days.

I trotted down the stairs and found Lucius and Draco standing in the foyer. Draco looked slightly uncomfortable with being here. That should have been my first tip off.

"Miss Belova, glad to see that you are home," Lucius said in his grating voice. "Now, where is your father keeping it?"

I was completely caught off guard. It? What was he talking about?

"I'm sorry, Mr. Malfoy, but I am afraid I don't know what it is that you are looking for. You are going to have to be a little more descriptive."

Lucius withdrew his wand, "Don't play coy with me girl. Where is the package that was delivered here this morning?"

"There was no package delivered here this morning."

"Insufferable girl, I told your father that you would be trouble!" he yelled. "Perhaps this will jog your memory." He said, directing his wand at my chest, "Crucio!"

The curse hit me square in the chest and I went down hard, my head bouncing off the marble floor. I sucked in a breath and refused to scream out. I didn't notice when he left through the front door as if nothing had happened. I didn't notice that he had ordered Draco to join him as he contacted my father. I also didn't notice the look in Draco's eyes or him telling his father that he thought it would be a good idea if he stayed behind and 'interrogated' me.

As soon as the Curse ended, as soon as Lucius was gone, Draco dropped to the floor beside me and gathered me into his arms.

"Are you okay," he asked breathlessly.

"I'll be fine," I whispered back. My entire body ached, not to mention my head

"That bastard," he mumbled to himself. "Which way to your room?" He asked.

I knew with out even looking that Macy had appeared to show him the way to my room. I heard him tell her that he needed some first aid supplies. That was all I heard though. At some point while we were traversing the stairs I blacked out.

When I finally came to, I found myself tucked into my bed. As my eyes fluttered open a nervous Draco began to hover over me.

"How are you feeling?"

"Better."

"Oh, thank gods."

"How long was I out?"

"A few hours, I thought I was going to have to call a healer." There was so much concern in his eyes.

"What was your dad looking for?" I asked him after a few minutes of silence.

I gestured for him to join me on the bed. He sat with his back propped up against the wall and I tried to pull myself into a sitting position as best I could.

"I don't know what it is exactly, but I know that it is something for the Dark Lord. My guess is that your father had it delivered to where ever he and your mother are currently staying. Why would he have something so valuable delivered to his home when he wasn't going to be here to receive it?"

I had to agree with Draco. He wouldn't have it delivered here. It would be where ever he was. I noticed Draco taking in our surroundings. It seemed like the entire time I was out he had done nothing but watch me, afraid to take his eyes off me for a moment. He looked around like it was his first time seeing it. I saw his eyes land on the ice cream tubs and chocolate boxes.

"Hermione bailed on me," I whispered. Then I couldn't help it, a tear slipped from my eye. Too much had happened lately and Hermione had hurt me. I didn't let myself believe that until I had voiced her rejection out loud.

"I'm so sorry," Draco said, pulling me into his arms, "I'm so sorry for everything." He held me tight and I let silent tears leak out of my eyes. I hadn't cried since I was a small child. There was some thing about being wrapped in Draco's arms that made me feel so safe.

Before I knew what I was doing, and before I could stop myself I reached my face up am kissed Draco. Our lips locked and at first the kiss was gentle, like it had been before, but then it turned hungry. I don't know who had wanted this more, him or myself. I couldn't get close enough to him, I had climbed into his lap and that still wasn't enough.

I tugged his shirt off over his head and I felt mine go soon after. Our hands roamed each others bodies as we hungrily feed from each others mouths. My bra was the next to go. I moaned slightly as his thumb traveled across my nipple.

Without breaking contact between our mouths, I turned my body to straddle him. I began fumbling with his pants. I had his belt undone and was working on the button when he pulled away.

We were both breathing heavily. "Are you sure?" he asked, looking into my eyes. "If—If we go any further, I, I don't think that I will be able to think clearly. Are you sure you want to do this."

I couldn't help but smile and reply with a smart ass comment, "I thought you were Draco Malfoy: womanizer and sexual extraordinaire."

He looked at me with a completely serious face. "Those girls don't matter. They aren't like you. I can't even explain it, and I don't know how to try with out sounding completely mad. I don't want to ruin my chance with you."

Hearing him say the words that had been going through my mind made me want him even more. "Trust me; I don't think you're mad." I said putting a finger to his lips to keep him from saying anything else. Our eyes locked and I finally voiced what I had been wanting to say since the first time our eyes met, "I would be content for the rest of my life if I could just stare into your eyes."

"I don't know how it is possible, but Natasha, I think I love you."

"I know what you mean," I replied, bending slightly to kiss him softly, "I think I love you, too."

Our soft kiss became passionate once more and soon I felt him tugging at my jeans. The button popped open and then I was aware of him flipping me so that he was now straddling my body. In the space of a heart beat both of our pants were gone. I don't remember it happening, or even how. I was only aware of his hands as they traveled along my skin, the feel of his smooth, muscular skin beneath my exploring hands.

His mouth then began to travel. First it was at my jaw, then my collarbone. I remember a brief period of ecstasy when his mouth found my breast, his tongue visiting each hardened nipple in turn. Then his mouth returned to mine.

And then he was sheathed inside of me. My body was moist and ready for him. He easily glided in and out of me at a steady rhythm. His pace increased as he continued. Both of us were panting by now. Soft moans escaped my mouth, which seemed to give him more strength to keep going. As he got faster, and the force behind his thrust got stronger I felt myself start to climax. I knew he could feel it as well as I squirmed beneath him. His thrusts came faster and deeper, driving me over the edge as well as himself.

He collapsed next to me as we enjoyed the happy after shocks of our releases. I pulled myself close enough that I could cuddle against his body and rest my head on him chest. I could hear the beating of his heart, still pounding rapidly from exertion and pleasure.

I sighed contently and snuggled closer, Draco wrapping his arm tighter around me. It wasn't long before I heard his breathing even out as he fell asleep. I let myself drift off as well. I hadn't been happy in a long time, but tonight that had changed. I was genuinely happy.

Happy and in love.


	6. SIX

**SIX**

When I awoke it took me a moment to convince myself that I was indeed cuddled up to Draco, and that last night had actually happened. My small movement must have awoken him, because when I looked up into his face I found those stormy eyes staring back at me. His expression was one of peace and happiness. It was a mirror of what I knew my own face had to look like in that moment.

He kissed my forehead and smiled, "Good morning."

"Good morning," I said, smiling back at him. I could feel my grin go goofy as I snuggled closer to him and leaned up to peck him softly on the lips.

And so the rest of our winter vacation had gone. Draco remained at the Manor and we remained in bed for most of it. Occasionally, we would find ourselves downstairs in the indoor pool or soaking in a nice bubble bath. We watched a lot of movies and explored each other in anyway that we could—our bodies, and our minds.

I hadn't known who the real Draco Malfoy was until the weeks that followed the incident with his father. I came to know that the arrogant, selfish git that was the Slytherin Prince at Hogwarts was all just a sham. He used it as a shield, refusing to let anyone get close enough to know the real him.

He hated his father's position as a death-eater as much as I hated mine. Both of us wanted so desperately to separate our selves from our parents, but the politics of it all made it hard. Draco was expected to follow in his fathers footsteps and answer to the Dark Lord when ever he decided to call upon him. I believe deep down, my father hoped the same for me. He had tried schooling me in the art of being a death-eater, but I had fought him the whole way. The only reason that I had learned proper etiquette was for self-preservation. I had no desire of becoming a death-eater, or a death-eater's wife, like my mother.

A few weeks after our declaration of love, Draco received an owl from his father. His father had no idea where he had run off to, but demanded that he return home the following day. They had important business to attend to.

We would be leaving for Hogwarts in less than a week, but we were reluctant to let go of the time that we had spent together. If we could have run away together and lived like this for the rest of our lives, I believe we would have. But, alas, Lucius Malfoy was not a man that you wanted to piss off. If you pissed him off, the Cruciatus Curse would be the least of your worries.

Reluctantly, I saw Draco off at the door that afternoon. We promised to meet on the train and remain side-by-side every moment that we got once we were at Hogwarts.

When the time came to return to Hogwarts, I still hadn't heard from Draco. I was worried, but I knew that whatever his father was demanding of him would have taken up all of his time. I would see him on the train and things would be good again. There would be no interrupting parents at Hogwarts.

One the train I searched for Draco. He was no where to be found. I even went as far as to ask Parkinson if she had seen him. She simply sneered at me and strutted into an empty compartment. I saw Zambini, but he seemed to be engrossed in a conversation with a fellow Slytherin, so I made my way to an empty compartment and settled in.

The train ride was exactly as I remembered the first one, claustrophobic. I wasn't as anxious this time, but I wasn't looking forward to being back at school. The only saving grace would be Draco.

Once we arrived at Hogwarts, I still hadn't seen any sign of Draco. No sign of him at dinner, nor in the common room. I thought it was strange, but there was nothing I could do for the time being.

It was two weeks later that I finally got my first glimpse of Draco. I was a little miffed that in all those days he had neglected to contact me. The rumor going around school was that he had just arrived at school. Apparently a relative had fallen sick and the Malfoys had gotten permission for Draco to arrive two weeks late.

The strange thing was that for three more days all I had seen were glimpses of him. I saw his blonde hair quickly leaving the Potions room. I saw him entering the dinning hall, filling a plate and leaving again. I saw him as he hurriedly entered and exited the common room. Never once had I been able to catch his eye. I missed his eyes. I missed the feel of his arms securely wrapped around me as I slept. I missed the smell of his skin.

I decided that I was tired of his avoidance. One evening I saw him leave the common room and I decided that I would wait for him to return and I would confront him. I waited, and I waited. I sat in an arm chair until long past curfew before I finally heard the portrait swing open and someone step in.

I watched as he walked through the common room, slowly making his way towards the boys' dorms. He didn't see me. I was still and silent—I don't even think that I was breathing. As he passed my chair I whispered his name. I was longing to have him hold me in his arms, to tell me what had been going on.

His face was startled when he heard his name, even more so when he realized who had uttered it. There was a brief moment before he schooled his face that I saw the longing in his eyes as well, of course I can't be sure if I had actually seen it because things happened quickly.

"You should be in bed," he sneered at me in a reprimanding way.

"Draco, what is going on? Where were you?"

"That is none of your business, Belova." He spat, the venom in his voice made me recoil. I felt like he had slapped me.

"What is wrong with you?" I whispered pleadingly.

"Just leave me alone." His face and voice were equally as cold. I stared at him for a long time, hoping that it was all just a cruel joke that he was playing on me.

But it wasn't. As I stood and reached out to touch him he jumped back as if he were afraid that I would burn him.

"Draco, please, can we talk?" Pain was starting to settle in around my heart. I knew that something was wrong. "What has happened? What could have happened between when you left my house and now?"

"You think that was real?" he asked, and awful, hurtful smirk playing across his cold face. "Ha! You were the only girl within miles and I needed someone to shag."

I felt my heart drop into my stomach, "Wh—what do you mean…I thought…"

"You thought what, that I loved you?" he laughed. "You were nothing to me. You are nothing to me."

"You said you loved me." I whispered.

"It was an act, Belova. I said what I had to to get into your pants. It was easy, really. You were so torn up inside, what with your Mudblood girlfriend dumping you."

"You don't mean that." I stated, refusing to believe the words that he was saying.

"Get it through your head. I. Don't. Love. You."

The words hit me like a bag of bricks. My heart felt like it was shattering into a million little pieces. I gasped for air, but felt like I was unable to draw any in.

I hadn't noticed that during our exchange students had began to come down to the common room on their way to breakfast and classes. The entire common room had witnessed the entire thing. Every Slytherin had heard him spit out those nasty words.

"Now get out of my way so I can get ready for class." Draco pushed past me and was gone.

Numbly, I finally got enough sense to make my way up to my dorm. Everyone was staring at me, all of them whispering furiously to each other, some of them laughing. When I got to the top of the stairs I ran into Parkinson, she was laughing.

"Did you really think that My Drackie would ever care about you?" she asked in a cold, disbelieving voice.

"Just please move out of my way, Parkinson." I said meekly. I was fighting to keep the tears from falling. My eyes were burning with the effort.

She refused to move. As I tried to move past her, she shouldered me hard. "Don't touch me, you dyke!" she shouted loud enough for several nearby students to hear.

I continued with my efforts to get past her, and was finally successful. When I got to my bed I laid there and cried. I cried for a long time. My pillow was wet beneath my face and my head was pounding, but I couldn't stop myself. I must have cried myself to sleep, because I woke up at some point during the next day. I didn't have to energy to get out of bed.

I don't know how long I laid in bed and cried. I had never had my heart broken like this before. It had been broken, but this felt as if it had been ripped out and completely destroyed. You can mend something that is broken, but once you destroy something it can become irreparable. My heart was irreparable.

The sad thing, though, was that I kept hoping that the next time I woke up that I would see Draco standing near my bed telling me how sorry he was. Telling me that he never meant to hurt me and that he didn't mean any of it. It was all just some sick joke that he had taken to far.

Obviously that never happened.

I was still laying in bed, miserably empty when a third year approached me. She seemed timid about the encounter, as if I would jump up at any point, aim my wand and mutter the Killing Curse. If I had had the strength to utter the Killing Curse I probably would have aimed the wand at my own heart.

"Natasha," she said in a soft voice. I fixed my sad eyes on here, waiting for her to continue. "Hermione asked me to check on you."

Hermione. That should have made me feel hopeful. She wouldn't contact me unless she cared. She had been my friend and I had missed her dearly, but that was so far from my mind. I couldn't even bring myself to be grateful for her checking on me.

"Natasha?" I focused on her. I could speak. My throat felt hoarse and words were too hard to formulate. The girl must have been worried about me. Maybe it was my appearance, maybe the look in my eyes, or even my inability to formulate speech. After a while she left me. I was glad to be alone again.

Hermione was not the one that I wanted to be asking about me. I wanted it to be Draco. I wanted him to care.


	7. SEVEN

**SEVEN**

I don't know how long it had been since the third year had visited me. All of my days blended together. Sometimes I thought that I was getting delirious from lack of food, but then again it could have been from my heartache.

My world had ceased to spin. It was in a permanent stand still. The only thoughts that entered my mind were the words that Draco had used to mutilate me. _I. Don't. Love. You._ I didn't know whether I was awake or dreaming, for my dreams were filled with the same dark and empty feelings that my waking moments were.

I had never understood when people had tried to explain what heartache felt like. I had always thought that they were overly dramatic; there was no way that it could feel that bad. How stupid of me. I now understood that you could indeed die from a broken heart.

At this point, I thought that death would be the only escape from the pain. In my weaker moments I often thought about ways that I could achieve certain death. I had even contemplated surrendering myself to the Dark Lord in hopes that he could give me an assignment that would be worse than what I had already been through. I no longer had a soul, so there was no sense in preserving it, protecting it from being tarnished. I was tarnished.

I didn't know what the point of living was any more, I only knew that I woke up one day to find Hermione sitting on the edge of my bed. I thought that I had imagined her, that she was some part of my tormented dreams that were back to haunt me. But if I were to imagine someone I don't think that she would have been the person sitting on my bed.

"Natasha Belova, it is time for you to get out of this bed." She demanded, staring at me with a half expectant look on her face.

She was very persistent, and after a few hours of her trying to get me out of bed I told her what had happened. I told her everything from me receiving her letter to Lucius coming over to the first time Draco and I had had sex. And she listened. She never said a word, just let me get it all out. Then she gave me a hug.

The next few weeks were also a blur. I was aware of the fact that I was attending classes and meals, but when I tried to recall the details of these events I was unable to.

Hermione tried to show me that life was still worth living, that things went on and that I would love again someday. I still had my doubts.

During my absence several rumors had started to explain why I had suddenly become a shut in. Most of them were hurtful, most of them had been started by the very students who had witnessed my downfall I am sure. There were things ranging from me pretending to be pregnant with Draco's bastard child in order to force him into marriage to being a lesbian and wanting to use Draco as a cover up. There had even been one about me trying to seduce Lucius during the Christmas break which had caused Draco to scorn me.

That is what I had been made out to be, a scorned lover, as If I had done something wrong.

I wished that all of the rumors had been true. Anything would have been better than the truth.

Hermione had been patient with me, holding me when I would breakdown in the middle of the library for unseen reasons, helping me catch up on missed assignments, making sure that I had eaten at least something at every meal.

And so life started to continue. I avoided Draco at all costs. I avoided anything that would deliberately remind me of him. The lake, Quidditch games, the Slytherin common room. The rumor started to subside once people realized that no matter what they said to me, they weren't going to get a rise out of me. There was no fight left in me. I simply walked through the halls in a trance, speaking to no one, paying attention to nothing.

Teachers look at me with pity in their eyes. Yet none of them would meet my eyes. They let me do my work and leave class once I was finished with the assignment. Despite missing a months worth of classes, I was able to get caught up and keep my grades up. I think that is the only reason that they excused me from class so often.

Professor Dumbledore had suggested that I see Madam Pomfrey and inquire about counseling, but I declined. You can't counsel a broken heart. They may have all thought that they knew what I was feeling, but this wasn't an ordinary broken heart. This was something completely foreign and new. It had altered my very being.

By mid-May, with Hermione's help, I was beginning to rejoin society. I was finally beginning to accept the new me and I was able to do the things that I hadn't been able to do since that morning. I was finally able to walk into the common room with out worrying about whether or not I would see Draco sitting in an arm chair or not. I was able to take a book out by the lake on a sunny day and read a chapter or two.

I wasn't completely over it, I never would be, but I had learned how to cope with my injury. I began to think of myself as a dog who had lost her left back leg to a bear trap. It would never grow back, but she would learn to cope with the loss and would be able to walk again.

It was almost the end of the year and I was looking forward to the summer. Summer meant that I could leave the halls of Hogwarts and everything that made me think of Draco. My mother had promised me a trip to Siberia for the summer and I was desperate to be there.

I was desperate to lose myself in a field of Siberian Wildflowers, surrounded by their pungent scent and their careless swaying in the soft breezes.

One more month and I would be able to do it. I just had to make it through one more month.


	8. EIGHT

**EIGHT**

It was late at night and I was making my way from the library to the common room. I wasn't in the mood to go to bed yet, so I decided to take a walk. I used to spend a lot of time roaming the halls when I had first gotten to Hogwarts and my old habit was coming back to me. It gave me more time to be away from everyone, which was still what I needed.

I let my thoughts run away with me and I hadn't really been paying attention to where I was going. Hearing a small gasp I looked up and focused on the figure standing in front of me that I had nearly collided with.

There, not three feet from me was Draco. He wasn't wearing the hurtful sneer that he'd had the last time I had come face-to-face with him. This time his face held pain, frustration, and longing.

He whispered my name. I thought for a moment that I had been hallucinating, but the raw look on his face, I don't think that I could have made that up. He opened his mouth several times as if to say something, but there were no words. I had started to move on, but right now I felt like he had said those hurtful things to me just yesterday.

I felt a tear run down my cheek. No matter what it looked like on the outside, no matter what I told myself and everyone else, Draco still held my heart.

I quickly turned around and fled from him. I ended up in the Astronomy Tower. The sky was dark and filled with many stars. I couldn't make out the constellations through my tears though. All of the progress that I had made in the last few months, it was gone. I should have known better than to go walking around late at night, by myself.

The night chilly for May, but I hardly noticed. My body was enveloped in numbness. I could still see the raw look on his face, the hurt in his eyes. He didn't deserve to wear those expressions. He was the one who had destroyed me, not the other way around.

I must have fallen asleep curled up in the corner that night. I woke up to birds chirping and the sun slowly rising over the horizon. I used to love sun rises, now they made me wish that I lived someplace where the sun never shone.

I stood from my place in the corner and stretched. I knew that it was Saturday and that I had no place in particular to be.

I heard a shuffle near the door. I turned in time to see Draco stand from the corner closest to the door. He was bleary eyed and still held the same expressions as he had last night. I wanted to be angry at him for following me, but I couldn't be. I hadn't been angry with him the entire time that I had suffered. I just wanted for it to be a dream.

I blinked and he had taken several slow steps towards me. He was close enough that I could reach out and touch him if I wanted to.

"Please don't." I said shakily. He stared into my eyes. I refused to focus on his. I looked everywhere but into his eyes.

"Natasha," he whispered. This time I couldn't help myself, I looked into his eyes. I found pain within them. "You are so thin."

I didn't respond. What could I say? _It's your fault, you are the reason that I laid in bed and cried, the reason I had no appetite, the that my heart would never mend._ As much as I hated what he had put me through, I still couldn't hate him.

I was able to manage one question though. "Why?"

Draco stared at me. "I'm sorry." He whispered stepping closer, "I didn't want to hurt you. I wish I hadn't done it."

"Why did you do it then?"

"I can't explain it right now. It's not safe."

"You owe me an explanation. You may not owe me anything else, but you do owe me that." I was beginning to get angry. That whole time I had never been angry, but now, standing face to face, I began to feel the ripple of anger dance through me. "Did you know that you were going to break my heart when you fucked me that first time?" I spat out. "Did you know that you were going to ditch me as soon as we got back to Hogwarts. Did you know when you told me that you loved me that you were lying?" My voice had remained a near whisper.

"I do love you." He whispered softly, so softly that I was pretty sure that I had heard wrong.

"Right." I said, I had had enough and I tried to walk around him and head for the door. How dare he try to tell me that he loved me.

He grabbed my shoulder and turned me back, "You have to believe that I do love you. I can't explain what is going on right now, just know that if I don't do it then my life could be in danger. I am not willing to risk yours as well. I had to push you away in order to save you. If—if the Dark Lord knew how I felt about you—" he paused and tried to collect himself and I shivered at the nearness of him. I could feel the warmth of his body as we stood so close together. "If he knew, I am afraid that he would try to use it against me. "

"Are you saying that you are working for the Dark Lord?" How could he turn into the very person that he had confessed that he never wanted to be?

"I don't have a choice. He threatened to kill my mother if I didn't. It's not that I don't love you, I just can't risk you." His voice had taken on a pleading note, as if he were desperate for me to believe him.

We had grown closer as we talked. As if we weren't in control of our own bodies, as if I were watching myself from afar, gently we both leaned it. Our lips briefly lightly touched. We pulled back slightly before we kissed again, this time we kissed deeply. We clung to each other as if we were afraid that if we let go of one another that one of us would disappear.

A thousand things raced through my mind as I opened myself to Draco. I couldn't let myself get hurt again. I truly believed that if he broke what was left of my heart that I wouldn't survive. This time it would kill me.

When we finally pulled apart I glanced around the room. I couldn't bring myself to look him in the face.

"I just need to be near you." He whispered. "I need to know that you still care about me."

"How can you ask me that?" Anger began to creep back into my voice. "How can you think that I don't care? I've always cared."

"I know, I am sorry. I don't think that I can tell you how sorry I am." His voice sounded as tears should be rolling down his cheeks.

"I need some time." I told him, then I pulled myself out of his grasp and slowly walked back to the girls' dorm.


	9. NINE

**NINE**

Once I got back to my room I curled up in bed and didn't get out again until the next day. It was late in the morning when I woke up, sometime between lunch and breakfast. For once, I actually felt like eating.

The dining hall was blissfully empty and I was able to pick a spot near the door and eat peacefully.

The door opened at my back and soon I found a red-eyed Draco sitting in front of me. He avoided looking at me, but he had sat directly in front of me. When he reached for the juice his sleeve slid up just a few inches. If I hadn't been watching him, memorizing his details, I wouldn't have noticed. But I did. I noticed two things.

The first thing I noticed was the base of a tattoo. _The Dark Mark_. The second thing I noticed were cuts that marred the otherwise smooth skin of his forearm just under where the Mark was. He didn't know that I had seen the cuts. Some were pink scars, older cuts from perhaps a few months ago, but there were also a few fresh cuts there.

I cringed at the imperfections on his otherwise perfect skin and looked back down at my plate. I had finished with my food, but I was reluctant to leave. I looked back up at the same time as he did and he caught my eye.

"I didn't know that you would be here." He said quietly, as if apologizing for interrupting my meal.

"It's okay," I finally managed. When I didn't get up and walk out, he took it as a good sign.

"Will you meet me in the Room of Requirements tonight? I just—I need to see you, to be close to you."

There was something about the look in his eyes that I just couldn't deny. I knew that I would end up regretting it, but my mouth opened none the less and I agreed.

That night I met Draco in the Room of Requirements as I had agreed to. We sat side by side on a sofa, not touching. Neither of us knew what to say. We just sat there and stared at the wall, uncomfortably.

"Sitting this close to you makes me feel better than I have in months." He said quietly, still staring ahead.

"I know what you mean."

"It killed me to hurt you."

"Death would have felt better than what you put me through." I replied, keeping my voice emotionless and dethatched.

He took a ragged breath and a moment to collect him self, "I can't do this. I thought that I could, but knowing that I hurt you was one thing. Hearing you talk about it…" I turned and looked at him as he shook his head and put his face in his hands.

"Draco Malfoy, do you love me?"

"Yes." His voice was like a soft breath.

I had known all along that I would take him back. Call me masochistic, but even though I knew that he had the ability to trample my heart again I couldn't keep myself from reaching out to him. "Lay with me?" I questioned and this time he raised his head and looked me in the eyes. "We have a long way to go, but just for tonight, I need to be near you."

"I know what you mean. There is nothing that I can think of that I want more right now than to fall asleep with you in my arms and know that it is not a dream."

Slowly, he laid down on the sofa, stretching his long frame against the soft cushions. I positioned myself so that my back facing him, my head level with his shoulder. He extended his arm and I slid closer so that my head was resting on his shoulder. He brought his left hand up and rested in on my head, then he brought his right arm around and held me close.

I felt his body move as he let out a few silent sobs.

I grabbed his right arm and brought his wrist to my lips, kissing it softly. I could feel the raised marks under my lips. I laced my fingers with his and drew his arm tightly around me.

That night I slept better than I had since Christmas vacation. I felt safe tucked under Draco's arm, like nothing in the world could hurt me.


	10. TEN

_A/N: I want to thank all of my followers and reviewers! You guys are great! I'm so glad that you guys like the story so far... hopefully you'll keep liking it! ;-)_

**TEN**

Of course, all could not stay right in the world. Knowing that Draco still loved me and that he missed me as much as I missed him did nothing to change the fact that if we were seen together that all of that pain and suffering would have been for nothing.

Part of me didn't care if the Dark Lord swooped in and killed me in some diabolical way of making Draco do his bidding. At least I will have died happy and knowing that the man I loved loved me in return.

We spent the last week of school stealing glances at each other and longing to lie beside one another. Occasionally we would have a weak moment and we would be unable to resist each other. We spent more nights in the Room of Requirements than we did in our own beds. It had become a second home, a safe haven. We never worried about someone seeing, only about when we would be able to see each other again.

I believe that after that first week, Hermione began to suspect something. My entire demeanor had changed and there was no hiding it from her. I'm sure that others noticed as well that a smile had begun to grace my features again, but nobody said anything.

The school year was quickly coming to an end and the library had become another second home to me. It was there, as I studied for my Transfigurations exam, that Hermione found me and discretely passed me a folded sheet of parchment. She never said a word, but the smile on her face and the expectant look in her eyes told me that Draco himself had handed it to her to pass along.

She pulled out her notes and distractedly began reading through them, glancing up at me every few seconds to see if I had read it or not.

I opened the carefully folded letter and stared down at the small, neat print that I knew belonged to Draco.

_N—_

_Something has come up. I can't explain it now. I will be leaving a few days before school lets out. _

_I think that someone is on to us, something is giving me an awful feeling, so I think that it is best if we stay apart for these next few days and that we don't have any contact until I return to the Manor._

_I'm hoping that when I return things will be safe again. Until then, know that I love you._

Hermione was staring at me as I finished reading and looked up. I quickly schooled my features so that I betrayed nothing. Folding it back up and slipping it into my pocket I smiled up at Hermione and started quizzing her.

She smiled, shaking her head and rattled off the answers easily.

When summer finally arrived I was happy to board the claustrophobic train which would be taking me one step closer to the port key that lead to Siberia.

Unfortunately, I never made it to the port key, or to Siberia. I had gotten into the black sedan that my parents had sent for me, but instead of driving me to the port key; it drove me to a seedy part of town. When it finally stopped, two cloaked figures immerged from the shadows and roughly pulled me from the car. A third one flung an unheard curse at me, sending me into dream land.

The dream land that I went to was a happy place. Draco had been there. In that dream world we had been a little older, married. We lived in the suburbs, some where that was generic and manicured. There was a black cat curled up on one arm of the sofa. I was curled up in Draco's arms. We were both looking in the fire, content to just be near each other. I looked down at myself and saw that my stomach was swollen with child. Draco had his hand rested on one side of my abdomen, gently caressing it. There was so much love radiating from the two of us.

When I awoke, I found that I wasn't in a safe, warm house but in a cold, dark space. It was slightly damp and it made me think of a basement or a dungeon—the smell of mold and algae was prominent.

I was alone, but I wasn't that way for long.

Shortly after I regained consciousness, a cloaked figure entered from some unseen door and pulled me to my feet. I was ushered to a room that was lit only by a fire that burned in a large fireplace—shadows were cast across the walls, obscuring and distorting the room's contents.

When I heard his voice I felt all of the blood drain from my face. The Dark Lord was somewhere in front of me, cloaked in shadow and hidden from my view.

"Miss Belova, so good of you to join us here," the voice said, stepping from the shadows and facing me from across the room.

"Like I had a choice," I muttered to myself. You see, when I get anxious, sometimes I get a little sarcastic. It really wasn't the best characteristic to have if you found yourself facing the Dark Lord, but that didn't stop it from showing itself.

"What was that?"

"Nothing," I answered quickly, hoping that he hadn't really heard my retort.

"Good, now let's get down to business. I need you to do a favor for me."

"And what makes you think that I am willing to do said favor?" I could see his face baulk at my response. No one said things like this to the Dark Lord; leave it to me to piss him off with my inability to hold my tongue.

I was getting angry, though—angry that I had been pulled into his plans. The last thing I wanted to do with my life was to become a lackey for Voldemort.

"I have many ways of persuasion, Miss Belova. The first of which is present at this very moment."

The corner of the room to his left was suddenly illuminated and for a moment my heart stopped.

In the corner, bound and gagged, was Draco. My heart ached at seeing him tied in that corner. I would have given anything to trade places with him. Of course, I couldn't let any of this show. I didn't want to give anything away that he might not already know.

"And what makes you think that this will persuade me?"

He chuckled softly.

The figure in the corner looked up at me with what were supposed to be pleading eyes, eyes that begged for me to save him, eyes that were meant to convince me that I needed to do what ever the Dark Lord wanted me to. However, the eyes didn't convince me of anything other than the fact that the figure in the corner was _not_ Draco Malfoy.

The Polyjuice Potion may have been one of the best ever made in the history of Polyjuice Potions, but even the best potion could not replicate Draco's eyes. The eyes that stared at me from the corner lacked the depth of his eyes, the intensity, the love, the dark _storminess_.

I didn't let Voldemort know that I knew that the Draco in the corner was not the real Draco. Instead, I let him think that I was a cold, selfish person. The Dark Lord may have known somehow that I had feelings for Draco, but he didn't know that I could be as cold as he could if I wanted to. Of course, if it had been the real Draco in that corner I probably would have cut out my own liver and handed it over if it meant that I could save him.

"I will give you one more chance before I demonstrate what sort of persuasion I have."

"I won't help you."

The Dark Lord's lips curved into what one could call an _evil grin_; "Very well," he said raising his wand and firing a curse at the Draco imposter, whose body began to writhe painfully.

"What about now?" he asked once the body had become still once more.

I shook my head and he nodded to one of the cloaked figures who promptly removed the gag.

Fake Draco was panting.

"I will give you one more chance before I do it again, this time you will hear his screams."

I smirked, but remained silent.

"Please, Natasha, please. It hurts," Fake Draco pleaded.

I ignored the familiar voice, "This is all you have? A weak excuse for a wizard bound in a corner? This is supposed to convince me to join you, to do you a favor?"

Voldemort didn't waste anymore words, he simply flicked his wand in the direction on Fake Draco and I heard him scream in pain. The scream tugged at my heart, it sounded so much like him, although I doubted that Draco would be that weak.

"What about now?"

"My answer is still no."

"Natasha…" the voice begged, "Natasha, I love you."

With the utterance of those words I whipped out my own wand and flung a curse at the imposter. He fell silent, as did the rest of the room. Hands were on wands, ready to use them if needed.

"The next time you want to black mail me, perhaps you should use a better fake."

Voldemort laughed with a bit of humor in his voice. "You are as stubborn and observant as he said you would be."

I ignored his comment, I'd like to go now, Siberia is calling me."

"I don't think you'll be seeing Siberia any time soon. Bring the boy."

A door opened and another cloaked death-eater strode in. This one had the real Draco by the arm. He fought against the grip until his eyes landed on me, then he winced slightly.

"Mr. Malfoy, we seem to have found your long lost lover. You were correct when you stated that she would see through our trick. Either that, or Miss Belova doesn't care for you as much as you originally thought." He gestured to the crumpled figure in the corner. "Poor, Peter, he never saw that one coming."

"Let her go." Draco said, coldly.

"Now, now, Draco, you know this isn't how these things work. You will convince Miss Belova to join us," he paused and smiled, "Just as you convinced her that you loved her, twice."

That comment felt like a kick to the gut. I schooled my features and forced my body not to betray me. I waited to see that he would do.

Reluctantly, I looked at him. The look in his eyes told me that the Dark Lord was lying. It told me that he really did have feeling for me. But that seed had been planted in my mind and it made me wonder, _could it have all been an act?_

"Very well, neither of you are willing to budge, to the prison with them both."

I struggled against their grasps, but in the end, it was useless. They deposited us into a cell and left us in the cold darkness.

Slowly, Draco got to his feet. He reached toward me.

"Don't."

"Natasha, you know that stuff wasn't true. You know me."

"Do I? Do I really know you?"

"Yes. I believe you know me better than I know myself. There was a spy at Hogwarts, there had to have been. Someone must have seen us sneak off together." He shook his head angrily and placed his hands on my shoulders.

I sighed and rested my head on the crook of his neck. His arms came around me and we just stood there quietly for a while.

"What does he want me to do?"

"He needs some sort of potion. He found a recipe that will make a potion that will, in essence, make him invincible."

"And he needs me to make it?" I said, disbelievingly.

"He has tried to make it himself, has tried using some of the best alchemists around, but nobody has gotten it right. There are a handful of dead muggles to prove it."

"So, why me?"

"Like I said, I think there was a spy at Hogwarts. Someone knew how good you were in Potions. Snape bragged to me once that he had never seen a more perfect potion. If he bragged to me, he could have bragged to anyone."

"I knew I hated Potions class." I mumbled.

Draco chuckled softly and squeezed me tight.


	11. ELEVEN

**Character Explanation:**

So, I realize that because the story is very one sided in its perspective that you haven't been able to see why it is that Draco is as "sweet" as he is. I meant to add in a section to one of the early chapters that would show Draco's inner turmoil and the reason for his change in attitude. However, I got so carried away with telling the story that I forgot that not everyone would know the "history" of (my) Draco.

If any of you have been confused, I apologize. Perhaps when I finish typing up and posting the rest of the story—yes, it is a finished work, just adding in some more details and getting it all typed out—I will post a prologue that explains Draco a little better. Maybe even add in a few chapter revisits that will show things from Draco's perspective instead of Natasha's.

What do you guys think? Is this something that you would be interested in reading? I make no promises that it will actually happen, but knowing that it is wanted will be more motivation.

Comment or send me a PM with your opinions. Either way is appreciated!

Now on with the story! :-D

**ELEVEN**

The potion was complicated. It contained a number of rare ingredients and it had to be made in five parts. It turns out that Voldemort had been making Draco track down some of these rare ingredients since the summer. He had used a hidden tunnel somewhere within the Hogwarts Castle to get to Hogsmeade; from there he was able to apparate to various destinations to retrieve them. It sounded dangerous and I wished that I could have gone with him.

Each part of the Potion was time consuming and required strict regulation of temperatures. It took me three months to complete the first two parts.

The entire time that I was working on the Potion, I had memorized everything that I had done; the temperatures, the ingredients, the order, everything. Fortunately, Voldemort decided that I would need an assistant to make sure that everything ran smoothly. That assistant, thankfully, was Draco. That meant that for the entire three months that I worked on the potion, I worked on it side by side with the love of my life. He didn't know what I was planning though. Nobody knew that.

September rolled around and we were allowed to return to Hogwarts. My second year at Hogwarts proved to be very different than my first had been.

More that half of the members of Slytherin had death-eater parents. They all seemed to know about my task for the Dark Lord and I received much more respect than I had the year before. Even Parkinson had come to fear me. I didn't like my new found fame, but I welcomed the end of my harassment.

I still spent my evenings studying in the library with Hermione, but at night, after everyone had fallen asleep, I suck out of the common room and went to the Room of Requirements.

I had memorized the ingredients and the process for a reason. I spent the first few months of the school year finding ingredients that would contradict those in the Dark Lord's Invincibility Potion. Some I was able to siphon from the Potions supply room—like Flabbergasted Leeches, Giant Purple Toad Warts, Wiggentree Bark—others I had to use Draco's secret Hogsmeade route to get—such as, Haliwinkles, Bubotubar Pus, and Starthistle. Once I had finished my research and acquisition, I began to formulate my potion.

I was returning to the common room one night in November especially late. I had finished the third part of my Antidote, as I had come to call it. I didn't notice the figure sitting in the arm chair closest to the door until I was right up on it.

"Hi," I whispered, realizing that it was Draco.

"What are you doing?" he asked, seemingly just as surprised to see me up at this hour.

"I...uhh—"

"Please tell me that you are doing something stupid?"

"Don't ask questions that you don't want answers to," I replied teasingly.

He sighed loudly and gestured for me to join him in the oversized chair. I sat on his lap sideways, snuggling in close and resting my head on his shoulder, listening to his breathing. All of my tensions seemed to melt away when I was in his arms.

Neither of us spoke and we both fell asleep.

The next night I meet Draco in the common room and he joined me when I went to the Room of Requirements.

"How long have you been working in here?"

"Since we returned to school."

"What is this?" he asked gesturing towards the various beakers and cauldrons that covered my work space.

"An Antidote," I replied sheepishly.

"Are you serious?"

I nodded and explained to him everything that I had been doing since we returned to Hogwarts. As I spoke his face broke out into a grin, "I wondered why you had been so distracted lately. How close are you to finishing it?"

"Closer than I am to finishing the real one."

"How can we be sure that it works?"

I regretted this answer. I had been thinking about it for a long time and had failed to find an alternative. "The same way we are testing the real thing."

Christmas break was full of Potion making. I finished the antidote before we left for break, and by the end of break I had also finished the original.

There was a week of break left and the Dark Lord had allowed Draco and I to spend it as we wished. I was dying to see Siberia. I wasn't even worried about seeing my friends. I just wanted to see my native country side. What I really wanted to see was a field of Siberian Wildflowers.

Of course it was January and there were no Wild Flowers, but the snow and woods were a welcomed comfort. So was finally being alone with Draco.

I showed Draco many of my favorite Siberian sites, and we ate many of my favorite Siberian foods. I think I fell more in love with him that winter, if that were possible.

While we were in Siberia we rented a cabin in the woods. I knew these woods and I knew that even deeper into them there was a secluded, abandoned cabin. It was there that we tested the Antidote.

I had found a common muggle criminal to test our theory on. If I had to kill someone I would at least make sure that I was doing humankind a favor. On the other hand, if my Antidote didn't work then we would have ourselves and invincible criminal.

We shackled our kidnapee to the wall and gave him the Potion. We flung several curses at him and it seemed as if none of them had affected him—as expected. I uncorked the vial holding the Antidote and splashed it onto his skin.

I held my breath and watched as nothing looked different.

"There is only one way to find y," Draco said, looking nervous.

If this doesn't work it will mean that I have sealed the fate of humanity. I am the one who gave the Dark Lord the means of becoming invincible. That will rest on my shoulders as long as I live."

Knowing what I needed, Draco threw a curse at the muggle. It hit him in the shoulder, yet it did nothing to him. Draco cursed.

A cry escaped my throat. My Antidote had failed. I felt defeated. Draco pulled me to him and held me tightly.

"It's okay," he crooned, "we'll figure something out. Potter always comes out on top this time it won't be any different. He'll figure something out."

I doubted that he could get out of this one. Then I had an idea. Draco's spell had caught the muggle in the shoulder; my Antidote had saturated his abdomen.

I pulled out my wand and turned to point it at the prisoner.

"Natasha, what are you—"

"Avada Kedavra!" A green light shot out of my wand, hit the man in his solar plexus, and he crumpled to the ground.

I was shocked. Draco was shocked. I am sure if the dead muggle could have been, he would have been shocked as well.


	12. TWELVE

**TWELVE**

Draco and I returned to Hogwarts that January in elated spirits. I had developed an Antidote that would counteract the horrible potion that I had been forced to make. There was no more pressure or late night trips to the Room of Requirements. We were able to relax and enjoy our selves for one.

The only thing looming over my head was the fact that I needed to get Potter to accept my Antidote. I hadn't quite figure out how I was going to do that, yet.

As the year went on, classes continued as normal. I still spent my afternoons in the library with Hermione, but my weekends and evenings were filled with Draco. We spent a lot of time exploring the grounds of Hogwarts, which often turned into exploring each other.

It was on one of our expeditions that we found the vacant dorms that were used for visitor. These are the same dorms that the students from Drumstrang and Beauxbatons stayed in while visiting for the Triwizard Tournament. We spent many weekends in these dorms, cuddled up beside each other in the beds. We pushed everything out of our minds except for each other.

The invasion was set for April 9th. Time was running out for me to find a way to get Potter to accept the Antidote. I had no idea how I was going to make this work.

One Tuesday evening I saw Potter making his way up to the third floor. I quickly followed him, but he ducked into the girls' bathroom. _What?_ I was going to wait for him to come out, not knowing why he had entered, but eventually I decided to corner him in the bathroom. He couldn't be up to anything good in there anyways.

When I found Potter, I was surprised to see Hermione and Weasley with him. Potter and Weasley immediately went for their wands. Hermione just looked between all of us, not sure what to do.

I raised my hands, proving that I was unarmed, "I'm not here to fight. I want to help."

"Yeah, right, like we are supposed to believe that," Weasley laughed without humor.

"We don't talk to death-eaters," this came from Potter.

"I have a way to defeat Lord Voldemort," the boys stared at me before laughing.

"Ha, He-who-must-not-be-named's new pet is going to help us defeat!" Potter spat out coldly, "And I'm in love with Professor Snape."

I looked pleadingly towards Hermione. I had told her that Voldemort had forced me into servitude and that he was going to be more dangerous than ever the next time she saw him.

"Guys," Hermione began, "Guys, I think we should listen to her. She isn't who you think she is. I think… I think she really wants to help."

We all regarded each other for several moments. It was Potter who finally spoke, "I don't need your help. I think that you should leave."

I could see that this was going nowhere. Reluctantly, I turned and left the bathroom.

The next day I staked out a place in the hall between the Gryffindor common room and the hallway leading to the dining hall. I was only there for a few minutes before I saw Potter and Weasley step out of the portrait. I watched as Weasley hit his hand to his forehead and then ran back into the common room.

Now was my chance to test out my acting skills and Potter's compassion. I let out a soft sob and shuffled my feet.

I had caught his attention. He glanced down the hall and then back at the portrait.

I let out a sniffle. He was hooked. Slowly, he came down the hall.

"Hello?" he asked, drawing closer. I let out a surprised sob and made more sniffling sounds. "Whose there, what's wrong?"

When he was close enough, I grabbed his are and pushed him behind the statue that I had been hidden behind. Holding my wand to his throat, I motioned for him to remain silent. He was smart.

I listened as Weasley exited the common room. He looked around and called out to Potter. Finally he muttered under his breath about Potter being an impatient git and how he better not be waiting to scare him before we stalked off.

I let out a relieved breath. Potter's face was inches from mine, but he was still eyeing my wand.

"Look, I just need you to hear me out, okay?" He just stared. "Potter."

"Fine," he whispered.

"The Dark lord has found a new way to make himself invincible, but I know how to reverse it."

"How do you know?"

"Because I made them both."

He recoiled, "You made Voldemort—"

"Just trust me!" I said, quieting him, "I spent my entire summer creating a Potion that would protect him from any spell that you can throw at him. But, I have also spent all of my free time, while being back at the castle, creating an Antidote."

"How do I know that you aren't lying," he asked as I shoved the vial of Antidote into his hand. "How do I know that this will make _him_ vulnerable? How do I know that it won't kill me?"

"Because we are on the same side." I said softly, "Uncork the bottle and throw the contents at him. Then aim at the area that the Antidote hits." I nodded and then turned and walked away, leaving him behind the statue. I could only hop that he kept the vial on him.


	13. THIRTEEN

**THIRTEEN **

The morning of April 9th was bleak and ominous. I met Draco in the common room and we embraced.

"No matter what happens, know that I love you." Draco whispered in my ear.

"I love you, too."

There was a good chance that once the death-eaters realized what I'd done that they would seek revenge. There was a good chance that tonight, I would die.

I watched the clock as the hours ticked by. Minutes seemed to last a lifetime. Finally dinner time came around.

I looked around the dining hall. Innocent lives would be lost tonight, and there was nothing else that I could do to prevent it.

As planned, Draco and I exited the hall and met with Lucius on the Quidditch field. He smiled approvingly as we took our places beside the Dark Lord—Draco on his left and me on the right.

Several death-eaters had already entered the school and they had begun to rain terror upon the unsuspecting students and faculty.

As the battle began to wage, Voldemort moved towards the main doors of the school, Draco and I trailing behind him. The interior of the castle was total chaos. Students and teachers alike were firing curses at the death-eaters. The death-eaters surprise attack had succeeded in catching Hogwarts off guard. Already several bodies littered the floor.

The room seemed to clear as Potter came face-to-face with Voldemort. It seemed like everything else in the room went to slow motion.

Potter attempted to throw a curse at the Dark Lord, which hit him and accomplished nothing causing Voldemort to laugh.

"It's over this time, Potter! I can not be defeated!"

I saw as Potter reached for the vial in his pocket. He fumbled with the cork, but dropped it as he jumped to miss the curse that Voldemort threw at him. The vial rolled off to my right.

Potter looked around anxiously and stared wide-eyed as I picked up the bottle and uncorked it. I stepped in front of the Dark Lord and he looked at me curiously. In one fluid movement I threw the Antidote across his chest and jumped out of the way.

"His heart, Potter, aim for his heart!"

And he did. The curse caught Voldemort in the chest and he slowly fell to the floor, his eyes held a surprised looked in them.

The death-eaters looked on, stunned by what they had seen. It didn't take Lucius long to react. He threw a curse at me, but Draco pushed me out of the way. We both tumbled to the floor in time for me to see the spell hit my father. Lucius grimaced as he watched my father's lifeless body fall to the ground.

Someone must have alerted the Ministry of the invasion, because suddenly the room was filled with Officials. Death-eaters were being apprehended, pull Draco and I apart and bind us.

"Not them, sir. They're on our side."

"Are you sure, Harry?"

"Yes. Natasha saved me out there, sir. I am sure."

Draco and I were left there in the middle of the room. We looked around and I saw a death-eater escape the grasp of the Ministry official. The death-eater raised his wand and mouthed something which sent a purple light flashing through the air.

I felt a searing pain and heard Draco yell. The death-eater was engulfed in a green light before he had even lowered his wand.

I don't know the exact chronological order of the next events, because for the most part I had been unconscious during them.

The Ministry left the school with the apprehended death-eaters, presumably headed for Azkaban.

Harry Potter helped Draco carry me to the hospital wing.

Draco discovered that the spy had been Thomas Nott/

Thomas Nott found himself suffering a series of painful curses which would eventually take his life due to blood loss.

A mass memorial was held at Hogwarts for the students and faculty who had lost their lives during the battle.

The school year was cancelled.

Draco never left my bedside.

When I awoke, I found myself in a hospital room in St. Mungo's. Draco was sitting next to my bed, my hand in his. His head was resting on the edge of my bed and for a moment I stared at his face, so calm in sleep.

I don't know how, but he must have sensed my awakening. His eyes sprang open and locked with mine, relief filling them.

"Oh," he said, and that was all.

"Oh?' I asked, my voice was hoarse from being unused.

"Yes, Oh," he smiled. 'I'm glad you are finally awake."

"Me, too." I looked around the room. Above me was a monitor that held my vital signs. I had an IV hooked up to my left arm and I had oxygen in my nose. "How long have I been here?"

"About a month."

"Tell me what I missed." He complied and explained everything that had happened following the battle.

"Hermione, Potter, and Weasley have been to visit several times. So has your mother."

"You look like you haven't eaten since I've been here."

"I don't think that I have," he replied and smiled down at me.

Once I had been released from the hospital, Draco had brought me home. My mother had been spending a lot of time at the Malfoy Manor since the death of my father and the incarceration of Draco's.

It was like having our own house, the two of us staying in the Belova Manor.

One evening over dinner at a restaurant in Diagon Alley, Draco dropped to one knee and asked me to marry him.

I don't think that you will have a hard time figuring out what my answer was. There was never a question about it.

The ceremony had been a small, intimate one. My dress had not been too lavish, and my colors were lavender and cream. My bouquet was made up of Siberian Wildflowers.

Hermione had been my maid of honor and Blaise Zabini had been the best man.

We chose not to take either of our families' names. Instead we chose to take the last name of Rozanov, which comes from the word _Roza_, meaning Flower in Russian.

The world was free of Voldemort, and I was the happiest that I had ever been in my life.


	14. EPILOUGE

**EPILOUGE**

Following our marriage, Draco and I moved to Siberia. I was happily surprised to find out that Draco was a natural at learning to speak Russian. He had quickly taken to the culture and most people didn't even realize that he wasn't a native.

We lived in a four bedroom abode that was in the suburbs of Krasnoyarsk. Our yard fenced in with green slats. We had adopted a small black kitten when we moved into the house.

My vision from when I was kidnapped by the death-eaters was getting closer by the day.

In fact, just this morning I had found myself sitting on the sofa, nestled under Draco's arm as we stared into the fire, Midnight, our cat, had been curled up on the opposite arm of the sofa.

And my belly was indeed swollen with child. It was to be a boy and I was due any day now. I only hope that little Mikhail will not be as much of a trouble-maker as his father was.


End file.
